We’ll no doubt here a lot about the Tory flat tax proposals during their conference next week. Here are a few alternative suggestions.
- A Fat Tax Your rate of tax is the percentage that you are over the average weight for your height. I’m still debating whether that should really be both over or under.
- Child Tax Your rate of tax is based on the the number of children that you have. And it increases exponentially. You can probably have the first one for free.
- Stupidity Tax The tax rate is set incredibly high. But there are a large number of well-hidden loopholes which bring it down to a reasonable rate. Only stupid people pay the full rate. The cleverer you are, the more loopholes you find and the cheaper it gets. And you’re not allowed to pay accountants to find them for you.
I like the last one best.
Of course, if you’re really clever, you’ll work out how to get round the restriction on using an accountant.Oops. What a give away.
We already have a stupidity tax. It’s called the National Lottery.
I think the French have an inverse form of the child tax, where they pay you to have more kids. Apparently it’s a way to solve their problem of an ageing population, probably to supplement immigrant labour.