The Countryside Alliance

In the UK we have an organisation called the Countryside Alliance. It’s a group of country-dwellers who want us townies to stay out of their lives and let them carry on living the way they have for thousands of years. Actually, it’s just a front for a bunch of murderous thugs whose idea of a good time is chasing a fox for miles and then letting a pack of dogs rip it to shreds.

They’re currently very angry because the government has quite rightly decided that this practice is barbaric and is moving to make it illegal. They’re so incensed that they’ll all getting on their horses and their tractors and coming up to London this weekend to tell us just how bloody annoyed they are.

This leaves me with a dilemma. On Sunday, do I go up to Embankment and shout “GET ORF MOY LAND” at them all or do I go and visit the countryside – which will be a far more pleasant place without all the bloody yokels.

6 Replies to “The Countryside Alliance”

  1. how can u be so ridiculous? is there something wrong with standing up for what you believe in?! for years people have been hunting, its a tradition. i dont neccesarily agree with hunting myself, but what gives you the right to go saying all this stuff about people from the countryside when you know nothing about it yourself. There you are branding them as thugs, with no idea what the countryside alliance is about. The march for liberty and livelihood was a campaign so that farmers would be paid more than the crappy wage they get now.

  2. Esme,Of course there’s nothing wrong for standing up for what you believe in. Unless what you believe in involves chasing small mammals and then ripping them apart with dogs.And what makes you so sure that I know nothing about the countryside? Maybe I grew up in a rural area and moved to the city as soon as I could.

  3. U r so annoyin u townies. u stay 2 your chavvy shops n we’ll stay in the country n go hunting. u don’t do dat u do sumfing else den us 4 enjoyment. get off our backs u blumin cowards i might not hunt but i know it keeps da fox population down!

  4. The countryside is the heart of the nation. It is also it’s breadbasket. Once there are queues for food stretching down the town streets the spoilt town dwellers may take stock. Contrary to popular opinion Sainsbury’s do not manufacture potatoes, they retail them.Work it out townies, you need the countryside and its’ support more than the countryside needs you. Switch on, or starve.

  5. John,If you read what I wrote, I don’t think you’ll find anything that disagrees with your points. I know we need the countryside for food production. I actually quite enjoy visiting the countryside occasionally.I just have a problem with people like the Countryside Alliance supporting barbaric practices like fox hunting.

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